What strange times these are?!?!
How is it possible that braving the grocery store can take this much energy? By the time you compile a list that actually provides for more than one meal, don all your protective gear, scavenge the barren aisles, start wondering which books you could sacrifice as toilet paper, navigate drunken-looking paths to insure wide berth from every human—like swimming among sharks, refigure your meal plan because half the ingredients are not available, rationalize buying empty calories while worrying about gaining the quarantine 15, repeat 782 times—“I will not touch my face!,” fret over why the poor checkout person has no protection, then re-sanitize your car, wipe down every purchase, wash your hands again, and backtrack over all your steps to wipe down every handle… you’re too tired to cook!
There are some interesting lessons and joys mixed into the frustrations and fears of this freakish turn of events. I am loving the positive stories of humanity in action, expressions of compassion, and the relief of art and humor. In fact, I need to focus on those daily. Hope and positivity are “brain muscles” we need to exercise, since negativity holds the biologic advantage, especially under stress.
While my heart truly goes out to all those with unfairly escalated demands on their time, many of us find ourselves with an eerie disruption of the more external structure of our days. It’s been a process letting go of the many cues, habitual thoughts and behaviors, and the subconscious metrics of what a successful day looks like. Huh?… What’s left?
I hope this is the opportunity to snap out of automatic and re-learn some internal metrics of well-being, productivity, and success. You are wired to self-monitor. Humans HAD TO learn to regulate energy needs in order to survive. But on the path to higher education and career advancement, you are trained to ignore the more subtle signals from within to focus on external goals. You are rewarded for powering through, dismissing the value of social health, and learning to stuff emotions. How else would you “get ahead?”
Of course, there are positives to this training—humans have accomplished amazing things. But at much cost. The current achievement culture does not support brain health or overall well-being, and the proof is in the escalating rates of preventable diseases, stress levels deemed a WHO epidemic, and skyrocketing mental illness.
There is an inherent distrust of not being busy, of allowing emotions to have any role, or of meeting your own energy needs before serving others. (This one is costly to all!) Focus, attention, presence, motivation, accuracy, perspective setting, brilliance, resilience, connection, collaboration, safety, health, and happiness are all risked when your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual energies not managed well, not regularly recharged.
- What if we could still do amazing things, but in a healthier way?
- What if we harnessed more brainpower by making sure our brains had all the water, nutrients, and rest they need to replenish their chemical messengers, repair wonky cells, solidify learning and memories, and create the novel connections that fuel new thinking?
- What if we checked IN more?
- What if we relearned the internal signals so exquisitely designed to let us know what we need to operate at peak performance?
- What if we learned to trust ourselves more?
Of course, the grocery store expedition is energy draining—it requires physical, mental, emotional, and social/spiritual energy. Though it’s not really physically taxing, you have to manage uncomfortable emotions in a sea of panic/scarcity cues, keep mental focus while attending to new safety regimes, manage empathy, and deal with the realities of social connection/disconnection.
IT’S OK to be exhausted! How can you use this weird disruption to build better awareness of your various energy needs? How can you learn not to judge them, but to embrace them and get curious about creating new ways to replenish them? And when you finally re-emerge into the routines of the world beyond 6 feet, how can you stay accountable to what you need to be at your best?
Each day, take just a few minutes to check in.
(Bonus if you do this while purposely slowing down your breathing!) (Double bonus if you do this as a family/partner discussion!!)
- How are your fuel levels: physical, mental, emotional, and social/spiritual energies?
- How do you know? (What are your best internal indicators = your new dashboard?)
- What has been the most draining in your day?
- What has been the most recharging?
- That’s it for now… just notice!
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts, ideas, questions. We are stronger together! And we are stronger when are kind to ourselves and others… Stay healthy!
